40 Lessons from 40 Years of Life

Because, why not?

I recently turned 40 years old, and it was the first time a milestone birthday actually hit me. Maybe it’s because I’m thinking more about my kids than myself. Maybe it’s because if my family history is anything to go by, MID-life is behind me (way behind me). Maybe it’s because I’m getting more introspective in my old(er) age.

In any event, when I turned 40, I decided to try my hand at creating one of those lists… you know the ones you see all over the internet: 40 things I’ve learned in my 40 years of life.

At first, I thought I’d be hard pressed to come up with 40 lessons. As it turns out, keeping it to 40 was the hard part. The below are lessons I’ve learned. Some of them have been lessons I’ve always lived by. Some are things that it took me far too long to realize. Some are inspirational and uplifting, and some of them are a bucket of cold water.

So, without further ado, here’s the list.

40 Lessons

1. Your parents are cooler than you think, spend time with them before it’s too late.

2. Knowing how to have fun is just as important as all the other skills you spend so much time learning.

3. Planning a career might make you feel better, but ultimately, it’s useless.

4. Don’t assume the person you are today is the same person you’ll be in ten years.

5. Kids. Change. Everything.

6. Relationships either work or they don’t. Trying to “fix” a relationship is a waste of time.

7. That being said, even good relationships require effort.

8. The bar to success in life isn’t actually that high. Show up, put in the effort, be a decent person, and you’ll succeed.

9. Blood may be thicker than water, but friends are the family that you choose.

10. It’s never too late to start over.

11. Grades don’t matter as much as you’re told.

12. Maintaining friendships is hard work.

13. The best way to get off the treadmill of life is to train yourself to WANT less.

14. Caring about the opinion of others is a sure-fire road to unhappiness.

15. Happiness is overrated. Contentment is where it’s at.

16. Comedy is philosophy in disguise.

17. You’re not as good as you think you are. Luck probably played a role.

18. You’re not as bad as you think you are. Bad luck probably played a role.

19. Get in shape when you’re young. It makes staying in shape later a LOT easier.

20. Most of the advice you get is actually good advice, but it might not necessarily be right for YOU.

21. Figure out who you are and lean into that. Don’t try to be everything to everyone.

22. School rewards those who are good at EVERYTHING. Life rewards those who are REALLY good at SOMETHING.

23. You’re going to lose someone you love. That’s not a hypothetical. Remember that, and cherish the time you have.

24. No one’s life is as great as it seems to outsiders.

25. The more you get to know someone, the less you will like them. We all hide our flaws.

26. Don’t pay attention to the news. Pay attention to history instead. You’ll understand more about the world than 99% of people.

27. Sex can solve most issues in a relationship. Communication can solve the rest.

28. Digital communication is a poor substitute for in-person human interaction.

29. We don’t know as much about science/the universe/our own bodies as we like to believe.

30. A lot of those old cliches that you dismiss in your teens and 20s, you later come to realize are true.

31. Speaking of old cliches: Everything in moderation.

32. And another one: An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

33. Sleep, diet and exercise will go a long way towards fixing most of your problems.

34. Have a sense of humour. Whatever it is, it’s probably not that big of a deal.

35. Don’t take life too seriously. No one actually knows why the hell we’re here anyway.

36. The smarter you are, the more easily you can convince yourself of anything.

37. The distinction between “work” and “fun” is just a matter of perspective. Perspectives can be changed.

38. You’re going to be wrong about something, maybe a lot of things, and that’s okay.

39. The first step to being happier is deciding you can be happy in the moment.

40. Being comfortable with change is a super-power that’s becoming more and more important.

41. Correlation doesn’t equal causation. Most people don’t understand this. If you understand it, you’ll make better decisions than them.

42. Talent is overrated. Anyone who is great works their ass off to keep getting better.

Okay, so that was 42, but I didn’t feel like cutting anymore out, and it’s not like someone’s going to hold it against me, right?